Author: PT White

The discovery of microbial life has halted corporate dumping on planetoid PDC3141-02, but has in turn endangered the crew of the Trade Federation scow, Spotty Conveyor.

To look at him, you’d swear he wasn’t a day over 35 standard years old, but Bosbit Matarcher’s birth records confirm the unthinkable – he’s 225 years old.

At a gathering of the most influential media critics, Core World Critics Association President Jaysa Namoor began lambasting the holomedia industry on the upcoming summer season.

Two hours after the odds-defying victory of Blob 14 in the third race at Fondine Raceways, the Umgullian Racing Commission announced findings of banned viscosity-enhancing substances in the winning blob’s system.

Jonava Billane, mother of Baby Ludi, the infant subject of a heated custody dispute with the Jedi Council, will appear on an upcoming episode of Essence, the popular talk show based out of Eriadu.

Jedi Master Oppo Rancisis arrived today for the first day of the Kashyyyk/Trandosha peace negotiations, though critics of the Jedi were quick to point out that had the delegation arrived four weeks ago, considerable bloodshed would have been averted.

The Judicial Department has denied the People’s Inquest demands to reveal budgetary information regarding the Jedi order.

Forces of the Corporate Alliance unleashed volleys of missile-delivered retribution to an industrial espionage training center on a remote asteroid in the Fakir sector.

Supreme Chancellor Palpatine once again took to the HoloNet, not to announce an impending vote or Senate session, but instead to offer an open invitation to Count Dooku, popular leader of the Separatist movement, to parley.

A powerful groundquake rocked Berchest’s most populous city yesterday, shattering many crystal edifices and prompting thousands to flee their homes and businesses.